56 words a minute
If I write 56 words a minute, does that make me fast? And if I fast does that mean I choose hunger by choice? And if I choose it, does it make me more empowered? And with power, does that mean that this effort will be successful? Hey wait a minute… what is the measure of success in this particular undertaking? Oh yes… 56 words a minute.
Is that a goal though? 56 words? And shouldn’t I be more ambitious… aim for, lets say… 56 words in 5 minutes! No, let us not get ahead of ourselves. Small steps.
And if I count them, how will I keep track of the time if no one is watching? Can I cheat? You would have to be really left and right brained to be able to count words, type words and count seconds all at the same time, wouldn’t you? Then when the seconds become minutes, some long division will be required… then what do you do? What if nobody is there to help you to carry the one. That would certainly slow you down in your efforts to meat the elusive target of 56 words a minute.
Have I been practicing? I should shouldn’t I. That was , one, two three, four, five, six, seven, eight. This is simply not going to work. The time I spent counting, I lost eight seconds and gained ten more words. Which–simply put–would mean that I am looking at a much more complicated type of mathematics. It may even involve having to get a pencil to keep track of the words while I type them, so that I will have an accurate record of my record of recording the record breaking word count.
And to break this now, ever so elusive goal, I would have to keep my thoughts really simple, and my words really small. Can you downsize words? Can you streamline words? What if I left off every other vowel, wo_ld any _ne not_ce. Hell, this is brilliant. With time, I could even remove vowels altogether… and write the notes short hand and transcribe them.
Does anyone know how to type those funny short-hand characters? Maybe I need one of those made in china comput-er-iters. Most significantly, how do I know which is my short hand?
How hard can this be really.
“Focus on more important things, like chemistry or biology”… they all said to me, when I set this elusive goal. What can I do with those things, correctly identify dogs and cats as felines? What good is that? Everybody needs computer alliteration these days. So I will be alliterate. Not only alliterate… I will be absolutely above all alliterates across all of Africa and America… Australia also.
It may take a long time to develop the tools, it may take an even longer time to design and build the computer-iter that can type short-hand, for people who cannot tell the difference between the length of their hands… or are by normal terms, considered ambidextrous… it may take a long time (trust me, I lost 15 minutes looking in the mirror just to see which hand was longer); but I know I can do it. One day, after perhaps a master’s degree in information technology, and a background in complex computational logic, I will be able finally, to write 56 words a minute.
I will even be so good at that time, that I will be able to write the short hand notes manually with one hand, while simultaneously digitally transferring them to the computer-iter, with the other hand, in that funny short hand Chinese script. Vowels not withstanding.
A five year plan. Can I do all of this in 5 years? You just watch me. I will prove them all wrong.
56 words a minute. Do numbers count?